Poccamandas

©1996 by Papa Joe

Once upon a time, a long long time ago, far far away, there was a little boy and his name was Poccamandas.

Poccamandas lived with his Mommy. But on the other side of the field, on the other side of the forest, on the other side of the marsh, lived Poccamandas’ Auntie.

Poccamandas went to visit his Auntie alot and every time he did, she gave him something. Do you think that’s why he went there so often?

Maybe it was or maybe not, but Poccamandas went there every chance he got. And every time he did, she gave him something.

One day, his Auntie gave him a chocolate cake. Poccamandas loved chocolate cake. Do you? Poccamandas loved chocolate cake so much, he held it close as he walked through the marsh.

He held it closer as he walked through the forest. He held it even closer as he walked through the field. By the time he got home, there was nothing left, but a crumb ball.

His Mommy saw him coming. “Poccamandas! What do you have now?”

“It’s a chocolate cake, Mommy.”

“Poccamandas! That’s not the way to bring home cake. The way to bring home cake, is to take off your hat, put the cake in the hat, put the hat on your head, and come straight home.”

Poccamandas said, “Okay, Mommy. I’ll remember that. I’ll do it next time. I promise.”

But the next time Poccamandas went to his auntie’s house, do you think she gave him chocolate cake? No, she did not. She gave him chocolate ice cream. No sooner did he start home when he remembered what his mother said. So he took off his hat, put the ice cream in his hat, put the hat on his head, and headed home.

But that was a hot day. As he walked through the marsh, the ice cream started melting down his face, down the back of his neck. As he walked through the forest, it ran down his chest, down his back. As he walked through the field, the ice cream ran down his legs and into his shoes. By the time he got home he was covered from head to toe in chocolate ice cream.

His Mommy saw him coming. “Poccamandas! What do you have now?”

“It’s chocolate ice cream, Mommy.”

“Poccamandas! That’s not the way to bring home ice cream. The way to bring home ice cream is to take off your hat, put the ice cream in the hat, but then go down to the stream and cool it in water, cool it in water, cool it in water. Then, hold the hat in your hands and come straight home.”

Poccamandas said, “Okay, Mommy. I’ll remember that. I’ll do it next time. I promise.”

But the next time Poccamandas went to his auntie’s house, do you think she gave him chocolate ice cream? No, she did not. She gave him a cute little puppy. No sooner did he start home when he remembered what his mother said.

So he took off his hat, put the puppy in his hat, went down to the stream, where he cooled it in water, cooled it in water, cooled it in water, then went straight home.

But that was a cold day. As he walked through the marsh, the puppy caught that cold. As he walked through the forest, the puppy started sniffling and sneezing. As he walked through the field, the puppy was sniffling and sneezing so loud his Mommy heard them coming.

“Poccamandas! What do you have now?”

“It’s a cute little puppy dog, Mommy.”

“Poccamandas! That’s not the way to bring home a puppy dog. The way to bring home a puppy is to reach into your pocket, take out a string. Tie the string around the puppy’s neck, gently, set him down on the ground. He’ll follow you home.”

Poccamandas said, “Okay, Mommy. I’ll remember that. I’ll do it next time. I promise.”

But the next time Poccamandas went to his auntie’s house, do you think she gave him a puppy? No, she did not. She gave him a crusty pizza. No sooner did he start home when he remembered what his mother said. So he reached in his pocket, pulled out a string. Tied the string around the pizza, gently, set it down on the ground to follow him home.

As he walked through the marsh, the pizza stopped being crusty. As he walked through the forest, the twigs and sticks scraped away the cheese and the sauce. As he walked through the field, the grass scraped away the rest. By the time he got home there was nothing on the end of the string.

His mother saw him coming. “Poccamandas! What have you got now?”

Poccamandas said, “It’s a crusty pizza, Mommy.”

“Poccamandas, that’s not the way to bring home pizza. But I’m not going to tell you any more. I’m going to your auntie’s house right now. I’m gonna tell her not to give you any more things ’cause you don’t know how to take care of them.

“But while I’m gone, do you see those pies sitting there on the steps? I just baked them. I put them there to cool. “Now you just be careful how you step about them. Do you hear me, Poccamandas?”

Poccamandas said, “Okay Mommy. I’ll be real careful how I step about those pies. I promise.”

Do you think Poccamandas was careful how he stepped about the pies while his mother was gone?

He was real careful. He carefully stepped… about the middle of each pie.

Do you know what Poccamandas’ Mommy said when she came home? “Poccamandas!”

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